Sunday, April 5, 2015

It continues...

Natbar, are you there?

Yes. 

Decided.

What?

Not to carry.

Hmmm... reason?

She is not willing. 

You?

I wanted to carry but... she is the only person who has to bear all the pains (physical) during either courses of action ... I can support, I can stand by her side but I cant' have the pain... so ...

Is she aware about the pros and cons?

We talked with doctors... major said we can carry ... there may be no problem ... in very rare cases there are possibilities of some problems during advanced stages... not any major problem... in case of abortion, medicine is not a good idea for its least effectiveness and associated side effects... the way left, is to "wash"! ... "washing" may, too, be associated with some problems as the stitches are not enough cured... problems are in either sides... benefits are in either sides... 

Explain.

If we decide to carry... then our family planning may be concluded... both child may be cared simultaneously... the mother may have some time to cure its present weak stitches... but, if we decide not to carry then the process of washing is to be done at the earliest which may create some problems for the stitches... and generally, washing does not adversely affect future pregnancy... but we have to do an USG as soon as possible...

When?

Tomorrow.

Do it positively. Take care for both of you.









Thursday, April 2, 2015

It is again ... too early!

After a long time. Last post was in 2012. It is March 2015. A lot of things have changed since last post. Natbar has changed. 

Where were you?

Nowhere!

Then?

Then, what?

Why didn't you post?

My wish.

Yes, I know, your wish... but why do you back?

My wish.

Ohh yes, sorry... any trouble or any news? 

No but yes.

???

From where should I start?

From anywhere... as you wish... I will clear my doubts by questioning... as usual!

You and your questions! 

Let start... I think your battery will be depleted soon...  and it seems you have many things to tell... so start.

Okkay. I got married on 27th January 2015.

I know that. I know your wife , too.

Ohh... certainly you do. We have a baby. It was 21.09.2014, we were blessed.

Ahhhaaa... what a great news! Girl?  .... and you are telling me today?

No.. its a boy. Sorry actually we all were very busy with him.

Certainly... you should be... after all it is your first baby!

Yaaa.. that's right but actually my baby, was preterm... not actually premature ... some "reverse system" was 'on' during the last few days of pregnancy... he had to be admitted at ICH for 21 days after birth... with NEC, Sepsis, Hypoglycemia, Hyperbillirubinia, fall of platelets, upper urinary track infection etc. etc. 

What are you saying? What are these things NEC bla bla...

Yaa... it was a tough time... these are the names of medical conditions... I would never ever forget those who were by my side in those days... and I should not care for those who did not even bother to call me.

Irrelevant... tell me about your baby. How is he, now?

He is improving. Weight was just 1.5 kg... now it is improving...

That's all... that is relevant and that is the wish... god bless him... he is a fighter! 

Yes, he is. Pray for him. Pray for his health.

Always. God is with him... but, dear, I can smell that it is not the actual story... isn't it... as I know you... you are here to tell something of current time... what is that?

Wife is pregnant. 

WHAT?

Yes... she is. 

Age of your baby?

six months.

It is too early... you should be more careful.

We were careful... just two times ... following conventional measures.

I didn't get you... and this is irrelevant, too. Now what? Consulted with doctors?

Yes... there are both some possible risks and benefits in either sides.

Can't get. Explain.

That means if we want to carry we may have to face some problems... if we do not want to carry we may, too, face some problems... and vice versa...

Just a minute... firstly do you know the exact difference between "vice versa" and "the opposite"? However, it is not required now... I can get you... now tell me what is yours' decision, I mean you and your wife's decision... carry or not to carry?

That is the question. Please suggest me. My parents wish to carry if it is a feasible condition ... my wife and in-laws are seem to have the different view... probably, they are not interested. I don't want to take any drastic decision. What should I do? Please suggest me, please.

What is running in your mind? State clearly.

Okay... let me try.

You better try... explain.

It is a good news. I have a baby again. I can take care of both. Both babies shall get friends. I do not prefer unnecessary abortion. Abortion is somehow critical. It may have side effects. 

and... then?

Is it scientifically feasible to have a baby within a gap of six months? Will it have any adverse effect on my wife and baby? 

Hmmm... so that is the problem.... TO CARRY OR NOT TO CARRY?

Yes... what do you think?

Mmmm... I think... actually... you have already identified the problem and so you have the possible solution, too.

How?

Mark the word "scientifically" . Do one thing... first make a list of best available doctors (gynecologist) within your locality. Then visit individually all these doctors and state your current situation... I repeat, just the situations, not what you are thinking... listen them carefully... you both... if possible accompany with some elder friend or family member... they are supposed to be more experienced... you can call any of your in-laws considering your wife's preference.... after meeting and listening the views of all individual doctors... PLEASE NOTE DOWN each conversations... always take your wife along with you... the actual decision maker, in this particular case, is your wife... if she is not mentally prepared then any decision will not be fruitful...  after consulting with all doctors in your list sit with your wife and take the decision, firmly... if you think, you can take individual consent of your close friends, parents, in-laws....

This will be a time taking process...

And that should be... take time... please do not hurry... take time... you may have at least ten days before taking the final decision... so take time.

I am convinced... this may be the right way to solve the problem.... more specifically I can develop some solid ideas regarding this...

Please never ever use the term "PROBLEM"... this is a situation... rather .... a CRITICAL SITUATION .... not a problem! Go and start the job... I am waiting for further development. Take Care.

Thank you... I will be back with updates.

I am waiting!