We and the Music!!!

The experience of being with my kids and listening to music from the maestro A R Rahman and other talented musicians like Yanni, Bach, Mozart, Ckayderman, Arvind Ravichandran, DSP, G V Prakash, Stromae, and Yuvan Raja and many many more is truly a magical one.

By immersing ourselves in the melodic tunes and beautiful harmonies, we enter a world of peace and serenity. 

The soothing music helps to relax our mind, freeing it from all of its worries and cares.

As we listen, I feel the joy emanating from my children as they laugh and play in the background. 

The moment is truly blissful and a reminder of how precious life can be. 

As the music plays, the worries of the world just seem to melt away. It is an experience that can be treasured forever. 

A fresh start!

Dear , 

Today marks the start of my journey to continue, again,  my stories. 

I am inspired by a little girl who I have no specific relationship with. 

She reminded me of the importance of writing down my thoughts, feelings, and experiences in life. 

I am so thankful for the opportunity to start anew in this journey. 

I'm excited to see what this new journey will bring, and I'm hopeful that it will be filled with emotion and joy and sorrows as well. 

Here's to starting fresh and pursuing my random rambling  thoughts! 

Love you,

Udaasin

He arrived!

It was 26th October 2015. 6:30 pm.
My first child, Zarun aka Rajan aka Ishant aka Khepu aka Ghinti suddenly became violent.
We all were trying to facilitate him.
We, however, managed him.
After fifteen minutes my wife felt some discomfort. We contacted the concerned doctor. He suggested C-Section on the next morning. Wife admitted to the nursing home. Due date was 18 the November.

Rajan was absolutely quiet and cool.

27th November, 2015, 9:27 am we were again blessed. It was a boy.

However, we wished a girl, but the Almighty surely has some other thinking to bless us. And we are all Happy.

Blame ... Blame... but please blame feasible things!

Natbar... natbar ... where are you?

I am here.

Why I am not getting you for a long time?

You did not search for me...

No I searched.

I did not get your call... you were busy.

Yes, I was... but I was in need of your help...

I am always, here! Tell me...

Many things happened...

Tell me categorically.

Okkay.... did you felt the tremor on earth on 25th and 26th April 2015?

The Nepal Earth Quake?

Yes

Why not... I was scared.

We all.

Natbar, I was so scared that on 26th I decided to shift to a friends apartment with family at the first floor somewhere at our town. I was so scared because, you know we live in the 5th floor and the lift should be avoided... and the baby, ma, and my expecting wife... all were at my concern...

Wait wait... did you say "expecting wife"? Are you decided to carry on?

Yes... didn't I tell you?

No... as I can remember you said not to carry... was it? However, I think good decision... I told me you would contact with some doctors individually for their separate opinions... did you do that?

Yes... I contacted with five doctors ... note their opinions... and my wife said that she would go for carrying in... didn't I told you?

Might be... sorry, if it seem I forgot all these... please don't take it otherwise... I do not want to hurt you... however, then what you did on 26th?

Hhhh.. however, my ma opined that my wife would not feel comfort at a friend's apartment in those days... she should be left to her own house for security measures as her home is one storied and there is lot of plains for safety purpose...

Very wise opinion...

So, accordingly on that very afternoon ma and I dropped my wife and son to my in-laws house. And said that we would come after three or four days to pick up them for home... once we all are assured that the earth would not vibrate again!

Simple things.

After some day when we were more or less assured that everything is ok now... I called my wife to consult in which day she would like to return... she said she would not return...

Why? again?

Really, Natbar, this time I had no clues... we did not have any quarrel recently... and there was actually no issue...

Then?

After talking a while she said she wold return after one week... on Friday.

Ok... it seems ok.

But I said that it would be better if she come earlier than that... no bargaining ... but I am concern about the health of the baby as these days are very hot and humid.

Then...

On Tuesday I noticed that the next immunization date is on Thursday... so I remembered her on Tuesday.

Then...

On Wednesday, she called me and said that no one from her family is capable to drop her due to massive work load... so it may be good if I help her...

Then....

After contacting my source I got one driver from my father's office who would be able to spare time on Thursday from 5 AM to max. 8:30 AM....

Very morning...

Yes... otherwise we had to travel by bus which might not be so justified considering the health status of our son...

yes it is... then?

I contacted with my wife and she agreed with me....

Good.

On Thursday, i.e., today we, me and Babulalda (the driver) started in the morning at around 6:30 AM and after willfully wasting some time I reached there at around 8:30 AM... we wasted time as she told me over phone that she is not ready yet..

Okay... then

Every thing was going well... suddenly my FiLaw said that he will come some days and will pick them for some social culture such as "Mama Bhat"  for our son...

Hmmm....

I said it is not possible and feasible for the baby.... as every one knows about the health conditions of the baby.... and I, particularly, cannot manage to attend any program in recent times... although, it may be helpful if I know in which time he will go to take her...

Then...

Natbar, what I should tell you... they just started shouting like hell.... in front of the driver ... and one thing my MiLaw said which just killed me... ignited me...

what...

She said, "each day I usually come home drunken and severally beat my wife..."

What?

Yes... Natbar... yes... and she was telling all these things in front of me but not to me... she was telling shouting to my driver, Babulalda!

What are you saying?

As you are hearing... Natbar... is it possible? Is it possible in a Flat? is it possible particularly when I reside along with my parents? Yes we celebrate occasionally ... within our family... but is it possible to drink outside and to beat my wife frequently? Will the society of the flat allow me? Am I like that? Have you ever seen any one to tell me about my such activities, ever?

Boss... right now I am not thinking such rubbish things right now... I am thinking that she told such things in front of your driver... and the driver is from uncle's present office... do they know that person... do they know that, babulal da or what may be is from uncle's office...

yeas they know him very well... because many a times Babulalda helped us while visiting doctors... and on 26th babulal da was the driver... we spent there at least 1 hour in that house with babulalda....

Then, dear I must say... they did it INTENTIONALLY... dishonor... defame... you ... your family... otherwise... if , for argument's sake, I believe that you beat your wife then they should talk with your family members first... should warn you... and then go for legal activities... did they said any thing to your family members or you in previous time?

Natbar... I SWEAR IN THE NAME OF MY SON... they (my FIL & MIL)  never told me any thing about this... and I believe that they did not say any thing to any of my family members... i.e., baba, ma, dada, boudi... if they did so then not a single person will spare me... never... at least they will talk with me in this respect....

Then what is this?

Natbar, just imagine what was going on my mind in that time? I can not take it any more... are they planning to destroy me?

But why?

I don't exactly know... there may be many reasons... probably as I don't like Uncle-In-Laws for their behavior ... but one thing.... my wife is continuously pressuring me to be separated from my family from the very beginning.... I don't know the reason... but she is doing and I can tell that swearing in the name of my son.... but I don't want to be separated..

But... whatever they did ... I am confused.... did you tell to your parents about these things?

Half of the events told... not all. I did not tell that Babulal da was there or he was invited by FIL into the matter.

Invited means?

My FIL just called babulalda from the car and told him that I am creating antisense over there?

What?

Yes!

Are they insane?

In afternoon today, I had a talk with Babulalda and he just said that "amra lok choriye khai dada... apner sathe manachee na.... ami gotodin-e bujhechilam ... egulo to bolte parina... driver... kintu apni mone kasto paben na.... easily tackle karar chesta korun.... okhane kichu bojhano mane hatike jangiya porano... apni kono step neben na.... bachatar dike takiyee ektu kasto korun.... sir er katha bhabun ... kakimunir katha bhabun.... jadi kokhono mone kosto hoy.... borodada bhebe amar sathe kotha bolun... jodi apni amake apner joggyo mone koren.... ami kichu kharap paini..."  ... we had a talk of 14-15 minutes...

Although , what if uncle know the facts... ie babulalda and the allegations ?

He will simply die... die out of shock...

That is.... be careful...

I am trying...

Did the immunization completed?

Yes... ultimately... I manage... but my baby is suffering from diarrhea... they just did not inform me... I knew it just before going to the doctor...

Boss... you should take a break....

From which?

From your life  ... from your pains...

Ha ha ha ha haha haha... Natbar, I think I should leave home and go to some mess?

Why?

At least at a mess my wife will not be there and no one will blame me with such rubbish unbelievable...

Think... think think about it.

Yes I must think!

Bye!

Bye! But be judicious... be with serenity...

Ha ha ha ha....

It continues...

Natbar, are you there?

Yes. 

Decided.

What?

Not to carry.

Hmmm... reason?

She is not willing. 

You?

I wanted to carry but... she is the only person who has to bear all the pains (physical) during either courses of action ... I can support, I can stand by her side but I cant' have the pain... so ...

Is she aware about the pros and cons?

We talked with doctors... major said we can carry ... there may be no problem ... in very rare cases there are possibilities of some problems during advanced stages... not any major problem... in case of abortion, medicine is not a good idea for its least effectiveness and associated side effects... the way left, is to "wash"! ... "washing" may, too, be associated with some problems as the stitches are not enough cured... problems are in either sides... benefits are in either sides... 

Explain.

If we decide to carry... then our family planning may be concluded... both child may be cared simultaneously... the mother may have some time to cure its present weak stitches... but, if we decide not to carry then the process of washing is to be done at the earliest which may create some problems for the stitches... and generally, washing does not adversely affect future pregnancy... but we have to do an USG as soon as possible...

When?

Tomorrow.

Do it positively. Take care for both of you.

It is again ... too early!

After a long time. Last post was in 2012. It is March 2015. A lot of things have changed since last post. Natbar has changed. 

Where were you?

Nowhere!

Then?

Then, what?

Why didn't you post?

My wish.

Yes, I know, your wish... but why do you back?

My wish.

Ohh yes, sorry... any trouble or any news? 

No but yes.

???

From where should I start?

From anywhere... as you wish... I will clear my doubts by questioning... as usual!

You and your questions! 

Let start... I think your battery will be depleted soon...  and it seems you have many things to tell... so start.

Okkay. I got married on 27th January 2015.

I know that. I know your wife , too.

Ohh... certainly you do. We have a baby. It was 21.09.2014, we were blessed.

Ahhhaaa... what a great news! Girl?  .... and you are telling me today?

No.. its a boy. Sorry actually we all were very busy with him.

Certainly... you should be... after all it is your first baby!

Yaaa.. that's right but actually my baby, was preterm... not actually premature ... some "reverse system" was 'on' during the last few days of pregnancy... he had to be admitted at ICH for 21 days after birth... with NEC, Sepsis, Hypoglycemia, Hyperbillirubinia, fall of platelets, upper urinary track infection etc. etc. 

What are you saying? What are these things NEC bla bla...

Yaa... it was a tough time... these are the names of medical conditions... I would never ever forget those who were by my side in those days... and I should not care for those who did not even bother to call me.

Irrelevant... tell me about your baby. How is he, now?

He is improving. Weight was just 1.5 kg... now it is improving...

That's all... that is relevant and that is the wish... god bless him... he is a fighter! 

Yes, he is. Pray for him. Pray for his health.

Always. God is with him... but, dear, I can smell that it is not the actual story... isn't it... as I know you... you are here to tell something of current time... what is that?

Wife is pregnant. 

WHAT?

Yes... she is. 

Age of your baby?

six months.

It is too early... you should be more careful.

We were careful... just two times ... following conventional measures.

I didn't get you... and this is irrelevant, too. Now what? Consulted with doctors?

Yes... there are both some possible risks and benefits in either sides.

Can't get. Explain.

That means if we want to carry we may have to face some problems... if we do not want to carry we may, too, face some problems... and vice versa...

Just a minute... firstly do you know the exact difference between "vice versa" and "the opposite"? However, it is not required now... I can get you... now tell me what is yours' decision, I mean you and your wife's decision... carry or not to carry?

That is the question. Please suggest me. My parents wish to carry if it is a feasible condition ... my wife and in-laws are seem to have the different view... probably, they are not interested. I don't want to take any drastic decision. What should I do? Please suggest me, please.

What is running in your mind? State clearly.

Okay... let me try.

You better try... explain.

It is a good news. I have a baby again. I can take care of both. Both babies shall get friends. I do not prefer unnecessary abortion. Abortion is somehow critical. It may have side effects. 

and... then?

Is it scientifically feasible to have a baby within a gap of six months? Will it have any adverse effect on my wife and baby? 

Hmmm... so that is the problem.... TO CARRY OR NOT TO CARRY?

Yes... what do you think?

Mmmm... I think... actually... you have already identified the problem and so you have the possible solution, too.

How?

Mark the word "scientifically" . Do one thing... first make a list of best available doctors (gynecologist) within your locality. Then visit individually all these doctors and state your current situation... I repeat, just the situations, not what you are thinking... listen them carefully... you both... if possible accompany with some elder friend or family member... they are supposed to be more experienced... you can call any of your in-laws considering your wife's preference.... after meeting and listening the views of all individual doctors... PLEASE NOTE DOWN each conversations... always take your wife along with you... the actual decision maker, in this particular case, is your wife... if she is not mentally prepared then any decision will not be fruitful...  after consulting with all doctors in your list sit with your wife and take the decision, firmly... if you think, you can take individual consent of your close friends, parents, in-laws....

This will be a time taking process...

And that should be... take time... please do not hurry... take time... you may have at least ten days before taking the final decision... so take time.

I am convinced... this may be the right way to solve the problem.... more specifically I can develop some solid ideas regarding this...

Please never ever use the term "PROBLEM"... this is a situation... rather .... a CRITICAL SITUATION .... not a problem! Go and start the job... I am waiting for further development. Take Care.

Thank you... I will be back with updates.

I am waiting!

   

life is very interesting, boss!!!

Ha ha ha...
that's called life!
A cake over burnt... or a cake over sugared!!!
La miserable ... possibly a great book!
I never read.
I don't wanna read.
Possibly the same story with the "... new bottle" type!
Might not be.
Who cares?

The things which you always used to deny... might become your unwanted choice!
Who cares?

Life is very interesting, boss!

A threat to copy right (?).... who cares?

Actually, LIFE IS VERY INTERESTING, BOSS!!!
You cant deny... and you have to take care of yourself, b'coz (?) ...... if you are there, the troubles are there... if you aren't there, you never can get the taste of victory...  now, please do not try to understand the inner meaning of victory, each time... you might loose it, again!

B'coz,  LIFE IS VERY INTERESTING, BOSS!!!